Honesty with yourself…

I have always found general relationships in my past so difficult. But since my journey started, I have really come to realise the reasons, the errors and it’s now time to rectify. I have found myself, I am confident that the future is so bright! Early on in 2015 I began to understand myself more and why I was the way I was. I no longer need to beat myself up or think of the worst always happening! Besides the now is what matters not the past. I began to see the beauty of me and the light that I am, so I must give that to others regardless. I found relationships with men especially very difficult, I just didn’t understand why I couldn’t find love? Oh my goodness, love wasn’t coming to me because I wasn’t ready. I have been fighting this battle without digging deep first. The easiest cop out was to blame every man for being bad! And I come to realise that it wasn’t that, it was my way of coping. I didn’t know who I was or even how to love who I was. I was busy looking for someone else to love me without me loving me! Well this I now know was never possible. You have to love yourself first, it is so crucial. I had a loving and amazing father, yet I couldn’t relate this to what I wanted! This was because my mothers love was missing. I didn’t understand anything, so hence the rebirth and the love for myself coming in abundance. I feel so free and liberated! I feel so blessed and truly loved, God loves me ultimately. I have been given a new page, I can actually say to myself that the best will happen and so it shall be. I have the power now to have positive and loving relationships with everyone that is good! I can see where it came from, the emptiness….and now I feel completely full. I am so grateful, everything really happens the way it should! 

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