Tag Archives: autistic

I am on a mission…Autism Awareness

What do I think I am going to achieve?

When it comes to #Autism I am most certain that I am on a mission and this journey, started when I realised that my daughter was sent to me for a reason….

She was sent to me and the world for a crucial reason…to educate, to elevate and most importantly to love unconditionally…without judging!

I was shouting from the roof top yesterday  (At a particular TK Maxx store, London)…

So after school, we all went to get a few bits…you can never plan for it or predict it…

We had food first, our moods were all great…then we ventured into the big store…the huge lion’s denπŸ™ˆπŸ™‰πŸ™Š

Sofia kept on touching (she can’t keep her hands still and to herself) her siblings touched a few items too…I was scared something would break! And besides when we are in shops I always say to my babies “look but don’t touch” So I continuously asked them all to not touch…but only Sofia resisted…

Well well well…all hell broke loose in a matter of seconds and before I knew it, I began preaching to much ignorance (breaks my heart this world)…

She refused to refrain, and even though I know it is hard for her to as it’s a part of her…unfortunately in society she has to conform, otherwise she will be labelled and rejected! And besides she will be breaking everything! 

Not whilst I am alive….

I am on a misson, trust me…I have to help her understand, persevering always! 

So at the point of analysing and deciding what lesson to teach her, I decided that I will not be buying her what she wanted because she refuses to stop touching what she isn’t supposed to touch…

Oh my, the complete attack, she chased me around the shop, she hit me, she threatened me, screaming on top of her lungs…”No I want my sausage now” “you meanie” “I hate you” “I want to run away from you”…oh my the list is endless…

But by now the whole world is watching, faces like wet fish…no compassion, no understanding…just complete ignorance…you are being judged by those looks..well by now I don’t actually care…but I got more upset because my sister who was with us, and 8 months pregnant was also upset from all the stares and glares…the laughing and sniggering…wow such heart breaking ignorance in 2017! The world needs educating…

So I went on one! 

Sorry but no in between with me, I was speaking to the world now…”don’t stare it is rude and unpleasant” “such ignorance” “no one asks you if you are ok? Or if the child is ok?” “Don’t worry, carry on shopping…she is fine” “doing alot better than most of you” “if a child was blind, deaf in a wheelchair you will understand, but when it is a mental disability you don’t” “watch me hard, and learn from me”

This is so sad, people will watch her and laugh not realising that her little mind is in turmoil, she can’t stop when she gets in that zone…she has so much going on and this her way of expressing (at the moment).. she is 7 in a week but acts like she is 2…but more shocking as she doesn’t look 2, she looks 10 and speaks like 16…

I am not going to make my life easier or the world’s just to have peace by giving in…unfortunately the reality of life and society doesn’t accept such behaviours as she grows into teenagehood and adulthood….so I am not going to raise her with the delusion, that her behaviour is acceptable…I am basically going to help and direct her no matter how hard it gets…

Yes she is high functioning Autistic, and she has her challenges at 7 (acts 2 when melting) and she is still finding her self… but I am not going to play that game…

I am blessed with her for a reason, I am on a mission amd that is to be real and to share my world…even if I make a 5% impact to “reduce ignorance for hidden disabilities” then I have done my bit! 

But forward and upwards I go with my world…I am determined and I will never ever give up the struggle.πŸ•ŠπŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™πŸ’™

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Autism is Real!!!

Autism is real, autism is everywhere but yet society seems to still be in the dark. I am expressing myself using my personal experiences, having an autistic beautiful diamond. I believe that I have been personally blessed to be given an autistic baby. My world, my eyes are wide open. I have learnt everything through my amazing daughter.

I remember right from the start, I could see that my baby was different. She did everything after her twin. However that did not phase me, as I just saw it as normal being part of a twin.
Whilst she is attending nursery, I was informed by the teacher that she had concerns as my daughters speech was delayed. She wasn’t speaking as she should at her age. We discussed and agreed that my daughter see a speech therapist to assess her.
At the appointment Β the speech therapist expressed concerns and suggested that Sofia would be referred to a paediatrician for further assessment. I mean the process in getting Sofia to see the speech therapist was a journey on its own. I couldn’t bear to think or begin to deal with anything. I was going through so much, and trying to look after all my children on my own. I was down and all alone. I couldn’t begin to deal with anything else. Very early on I had been told that Sofia could possibly be autistic. But I needed to get the correct diagnosis from the doctors. I refused to read anything on the Internet or any books. I simply didn’t want to be confused even more. I was already confused and anxious but most importantly I was extremely scared. I felt like I didn’t know where to begin. Things just seemed worse, I couldn’t even begin to deal with any of it more. But with God and strength and love and faith I went through the motions. I started to realise that my baby was starting school soon and I needed to get her the right support as she was struggling. She was always upset at nursery when I had to drop her off and she would kick off and have tantrums daily.
It was extremely difficult! Days were so bad, especially being in public. People would stare and shake their heads. I felt so ashamed and so anxious. I just beat myself up because my daughter was just so difficult to understand or handle. She didn’t speak and so she couldn’t tell me what was wrong. She would just scream and throw herself everywhere for everything. People are so ignorant and unaware so instead they stare and make it hard for one to function. I struggled with my daughter, it was way too hard. She didn’t get diagnosed until July 2014. I had to write and voice my concerns as I felt not having a diagnosis made it harder for people to even shut up as people like to assume and be judgemental just by face value. I mean having a diagnosis wasn’t for the benefits of others but solely for my daughter to get the help and support she needed to progress. My diamond is very high functioning and she has high sensory needs. I came to a realisation and I finally came to accept that yes my daughter is autistic and she needs the help and support required for her to progress. My mission was to simply focus on my child. I have to put her first and let her educate people. Let’s learn from her. As everyone is different autistic or not. What a journey we have been on! It’s been amazing, how I have learnt so much about autism from my amazing beautiful daughter.